Make Room for Love

If your schedule and your head are currently over-occupied by things other than love, love isn’t going to just walk into your life like that. It’s by investing enough time and mental energy toward this goal that you’ll one day reach it.

If you want more advice on finding more time for what is essential to you, I invite you to listen to EP 78 Running out of time with Clotilde Dusoulier.

Open Yourself to Change

The same habits, the same circle, the same daily routine don’t invite you to think that a change is possible.

To get change, create change: don’t plan everything in advance, invite mystery, the unknown, spontaneity, for example by doing what you love elsewhere (change café, change gym, discover other places in your city), be curious, try new activities, go and meet new people not with the aim of meeting the right one but to show yourself that change exists, that all you have to do is breathe it into your life.

Socialize by Getting a Taste for Risk Again

You most certainly have regular activities such as grocery shopping or going to the gym. A very good exercise to do during these activities is to force yourself to talk or interact with strangers, not with the aim of flirting, but with the aim of reprogramming your reptilian brain that taking risks by socializing is good.

And who knows, you might even make some lovely encounters.

Be “Professional” in Your Search for a Partner

If you truly want to meet someone, but you don’t make enough effort either by signing up on dating sites or by going out enough to meet new people, you’re sure to stay single.

The man isn’t going to come and get you at home in your pajamas.

Invest a number of hours per week to meet potential partners. Because meeting the right one is also a matter of statistics.

It will also let you get used again to being surrounded, to making yourself look good to go out with someone. Meet these people with the aim of getting to know them, of having a good time without putting pressure on yourself to have to date them or to please them. Also dare to go out without making an effort by being 100% natural. And if they demoralize you or make you lose hope about meeting someone, don’t waste your time with them.

Getting yourself moving again will help you release something other than loneliness and open up more for your next partner.

❤️ Watch my webinar on how to finally be happy in love!

Do the Deep Work to Get Out of This Celibacy for Good

The longer you’ve been single, the more you’ve developed habits and routines to get used to being alone, the more you may have developed hyper-independence. Listen to EP 73 on the 4 types of dependencies to learn more about hyper-independence.

To assess your level of hyper-independence, look at:

• Whether you have close friends or just acquaintances who spend time with you?
• Whether you manage to say what’s on your heart to your friends?
• Whether you often “lose” your friends?

The Price of Being Yourself Shouldn’t Be Isolation

Isolation or long-term celibacy is often a means of protection: because you’ve suffered too much, because you don’t want to suffer anymore and you think that the only way to achieve that is by staying alone.

A first exercise to unblock this fear is to learn to be 100% yourself in the presence of your friends and by daring to displease. First you learn that you can be yourself and displease, while being in relationship with people.

Working on the Cause of Your Hyper-Independence to Dare to Risk Love Again

Being in a relationship will always have an element of risk, and so to get out of this isolation, the most important thing to do is to heal the wounds of your past that have made you close yourself off to love.

Watch my free webinar to find out how your past influences your love life .