{"id":1246055,"date":"2026-10-25T13:01:15","date_gmt":"2026-10-25T13:01:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/?p=1246055"},"modified":"2026-10-25T13:18:38","modified_gmt":"2026-10-25T13:18:38","slug":"75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/","title":{"rendered":"75. The 4 indirect obstacles to love"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"1246055\" class=\"elementor elementor-1246055 elementor-1067810\" data-elementor-post-type=\"post\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-7ed86594 elementor-section-content-top elementor-section-full_width elementor-section-height-min-height elementor-section-items-bottom elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"7ed86594\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-6ea7bd98\" data-id=\"6ea7bd98\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3d639127 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"3d639127\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-xl\">The 4 indirect obstacles to love<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-62d37295 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"62d37295\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-4e162bd6\" data-id=\"4e162bd6\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-376509b elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"376509b\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You are listening to episode 75, the four indirect obstacles to love. Normally, in my episodes, I talk a lot about the impact of your past, of your love patterns on your love life. If you are discovering my podcast now, I recommend listening to <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/3-quest-ce-quun-schema-amoureux\/\">episode 3<\/a> on love patterns or else <a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/14-blessure-dabandon-comment-elle-se-manifeste-en-amour\/\">episode 14<\/a> to <a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/18-blessure-de-lhumiliation-comment-elle-se-manifeste-en-amour\/\">18<\/a><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> on Lise Bourbeau\u2019s five wounds.&nbsp;<\/span>\n<span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In this episode I am starting a new series where I wanted to talk to you about the indirect obstacles to love that are not necessarily related to your past, but more about the state you are in, the circumstances you are in.<\/span> So in this episode, I am going to explain how these indirect obstacles have an impact on your love life, as I observe it with more than 600 people accompanied, and a bit the different scenarios. \n<p class=\"has-background\" style=\"background-color: #eeeeee;\">\u2764\ufe0f Watch <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/registrationpastwounds\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">my webinar <\/a><\/strong>on how to finally be happy in love!<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-38912f3 elementor-widget elementor-widget-spacer\" data-id=\"38912f3\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"spacer.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-spacer\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-spacer-inner\"><\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-96344af elementor-widget elementor-widget-video\" data-id=\"96344af\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;youtube_url&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/youtu.be\\\/2rF9HRMufxE?si=LZzWyoWemKeLKf8r&quot;,&quot;video_type&quot;:&quot;youtube&quot;,&quot;controls&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"video.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-wrapper elementor-open-inline\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-video\"><\/div>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-693bb58 elementor-hidden-desktop elementor-hidden-tablet elementor-hidden-mobile elementor-widget elementor-widget-html\" data-id=\"693bb58\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"html.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<iframe name=\"Ausha Podcast Player\" frameborder=\"0\" loading=\"lazy\" id=\"ausha-hROO\" height=\"220\" style=\"border: none; width:100%; height:220px\" src=\"https:\/\/player.ausha.co\/index.html?showId=bjPkYiPMPlqo&color=%23d13523&podcastId=blaElc0PO6Pn&v=3&playerId=ausha-hROO\"><\/iframe><script src=\"https:\/\/player.ausha.co\/ausha-player.js\"><\/script>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-inner-section elementor-element elementor-element-4b747fae elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"4b747fae\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-1478e3b2\" data-id=\"1478e3b2\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-30b4600 elementor-section-full_width elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"30b4600\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-no\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-638b26e7\" data-id=\"638b26e7\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-inner-section elementor-element elementor-element-3576016a elementor-section-content-bottom elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"3576016a\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-aeb5c8a\" data-id=\"aeb5c8a\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-57fcf904 elementor-widget elementor-widget-spacer\" data-id=\"57fcf904\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"spacer.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-spacer\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-spacer-inner\"><\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-inner-section elementor-element elementor-element-1c7dd0a5 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"1c7dd0a5\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-50 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-72b2b99b\" data-id=\"72b2b99b\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6412be51 elementor-invisible elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"6412be51\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_animation&quot;:&quot;fadeInLeft&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\">For you<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-59102584 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"59102584\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"FREE_Webinar_%22HOW_TO_FREE_OURSELVES_FROM_THE_PATTERNS_THAT_PREVENT_US_FROM_BEING_HAPPY_IN_LOVE%22\"><\/span><span>FREE Webinar \n\"HOW TO FREE OURSELVES FROM THE PATTERNS THAT PREVENT US FROM BEING HAPPY IN LOVE?\"<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7a85f519 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"7a85f519\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tSubscribe now to my newsletter and receive the replay of the webinar how a wound from the past is created ?\u00a0\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-50 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-5f8fffdc\" data-id=\"5f8fffdc\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-5c8b433f elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"5c8b433f\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-47aaa2b8\" data-id=\"47aaa2b8\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5d5a41ef elementor-widget elementor-widget-shortcode\" data-id=\"5d5a41ef\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"shortcode.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-shortcode\"><script src=https:\/\/sandy-kaufmann.mykajabi.com\/forms\/2149274867\/embed.js><\/script><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-36e52f61 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"36e52f61\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>* Mandatory fields<\/p><p>If you register for this webinar, you will be subscribed to my newsletter and you will be able to receive offers from me. You can unsubscribe at any time. Please read my<br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/datenschutzbestimmungen\/\">privacy policy (german only)<\/a>, to see how I process the data.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-4fa4c09b elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"4fa4c09b\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-418898d7\" data-id=\"418898d7\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6a49aba elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"6a49aba\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"The_four_indirect_obstacles_to_love\"><\/span>The four indirect obstacles to love<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-633dc5e6 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"633dc5e6\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The four obstacles I am going to talk about are self-confidence, acceptance of your body, lack of time and work-life balance. I have already talked about the obstacle that is for me indirect but nevertheless the most important one, self-love, in two podcast episodes <a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/27-lamour-de-soi-definit-tes-standards-relationnels\/\">the <\/a><\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/27-lamour-de-soi-definit-tes-standards-relationnels\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">episode 27<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> where I describe how self-love represents a relational standard and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/28-comment-cultiver-plus-damour-de-soi\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">episode 28<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> where I give you a few more solutions to cultivate more.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So in this episode, I am going to explain how these indirect obstacles have an impact on your love life and a bit the different scenarios. And starting from <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">episodes <a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/76-ludovic-leroux-la-pleine-confiance\/\">76<\/a><\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> to 79, we will talk more about solutions. So I want to invite a few experts in each of these areas to see how you can work on these indirect obstacles to love. <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-574afea elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"574afea\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Self-confidence\"><\/span>Self-confidence<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-63fd0d5 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"63fd0d5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The first obstacle I would like to talk about is self-confidence. It is an obstacle that often seems obvious. It is often something we say \u201cI lack self-confidence\u201d so I find it hard to meet partners etc.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I wanted to list all the consequences this obstacle can have in love, because we often underestimate all its consequences.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The first is obvious, it will block you from going toward partners you really like. You might play it safe and just wait for the partners who come to you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The second point is that it will somewhat prevent you from being authentic or from really showing who you are and ultimately take away the other\u2019s opportunity to get to know you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Lack of self-confidence will often put you in doubt. Is what you are doing right? Is your judgment right? Is your opinion right? And so it will be difficult for you to enter into negotiation with the other, to enter into discussion with the other, especially in moments when you disagree.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you will, this lack of self-confidence will add a layer of difficulty to the relationship.<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It may also block you from daring. It may force you to stay a bit more in your comfort zone because you will have this fear of the consequences of your actions. It will be difficult to make mistakes or to accept making them.<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">When things go badly in the couple, it can also have an impact on your confidence in your couple\u2019s ability to turn the tide. So for example to get through a crisis or resolve a difficulty you have.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can potentially also have an impact on the optimism you have for your relationship.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And finally it can create a kind of inner distance from the other, because you are never really totally yourself.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What I am saying here is not that you must have 100&nbsp;% self-confidence to be able to be in a couple. I am trying more to make you aware of how this lack of self-confidence can have an impact on your couple life. Of course the goal is not to be perfect in a couple. The couple can help you partially heal this lack of self-confidence, especially if the other sees things in you that you do not see yourself or if the other is confident, they can also help you move forward, get past this comfort zone. And it is the same for all the other obstacles. <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4eea8d2 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"4eea8d2\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Body_acceptance\"><\/span>Body acceptance<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7fcc279 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"7fcc279\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The second obstacle is body acceptance. So if you find it hard to love your body, to find yourself handsome or beautiful, if you have complexes, whether about your weight, acne, the shape of your face, your height or if you have a disability in your body, this difficulty accepting your body can have quite a lot of impact on your love life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can impact the confidence you have in your ability to please someone, in your ability to seduce others.<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can impact your choice of partner, that is, you will not choose the partners you really like, but more those who come to you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can also shape the way you behave with the other and make you over-adapt, that is, you accept more things because you think you do not really have opportunities to find someone else.<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can impact how easy or difficult it is for you to separate for exactly the same reason. Because you think that with this complex, it is hard to find another partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can impact the security in your couple, that is, you may link the duration of your couple or the security of the couple, or the fact that the other wants to stay with you directly to your complex. So if I give you an example, if you think your weight is really decisive for keeping someone, well you may think that if you gain a bit too much weight, the other will leave you.<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And so this will generate an enormous amount of insecurity in you, an enormous need to be in control of your complex, so it can really go very far.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It can also lead to situations of disrespect, that is, you accept that the other speaks badly to you or makes remarks to you because you speak badly to yourself. I often say the other is the mirror of oneself, so the less tolerant you are toward your body, the less tolerant the person in front of you will quickly be and all that.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A difficulty accepting your body can also have a big impact on sexuality, on being comfortable sexually.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You see that all of this and the body in particular is an enormous obstacle. Because as long as you do not sufficiently accept your body, again we are not talking about perfection, it will add one more layer of difficulty to the relationship.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-034503c elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"034503c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Lack_of_time\"><\/span>Lack of time<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-ae423ec elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"ae423ec\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The third obstacle is lack of time. Time is a resource we cannot recover, it is a perishable resource.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And I always say meeting someone is also a question of statistics. If you estimate that between 5 and 10&nbsp;% of the people you meet are compatible with you, that concretely means you need to meet between 90 and 95 people to find between five and ten people who are compatible with you. And to manage to meet that number of people, it requires you to invest time. It is rare to meet your partner sitting on your sofa.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And the second thing is that you invest time in dating without yet having the result. So it is a bit of time that you invest for the future and that ultimately requires you to give up other things.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I classify lack of time in two categories&nbsp;:<\/span><\/p><ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are time constraints. For example you have a demanding job, you have to do training, you are a single mom or single dad, so you have the majority custody of your child or children. You may have to take care of a dependent person, it could be your parents and grandparents, sick people etc\u2026.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You have the lack of time for leisure or things that are rather a personal choice. So for example you can have a super full social life, filled with associations, sports, etc. You can be passionate about travel, so travel all the time. You can launch into entrepreneurship, into your dream job. In fact, it is an obstacle that in itself does not always seem negative, especially if you have a full social life, if you travel, well you can say well yes, I am enjoying my life, I do not depend on a potential partner, they will come when they come. And in fact that is a false idea. Because yes, you can meet people within your social life, within your travels.But are you investing your energy in finding a partner in those activities? And that is not always the case.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><\/ul><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Often what I notice in the people I accompany is that you let life carry you, you enjoy life, so to speak, then after a few years, you say Oh my god, but I want to start a family and then I have nobody. So this is really quite an important obstacle and it has several impacts on how you look for a partner.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><ul><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">First, you do not invest enough time to look for a partner or to get to know new people. You continue with your circle that you already know, with the activities you already know.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Or else you also invest time, but perhaps without really going all in or it will not be regular enough. So you will have an intensive period, then afterwards you will stop.<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Or you will be in a hurry, that is, you will want things to happen fast, it will impact your mindset because it ultimately requires you to give up things that could potentially bring you pleasure.<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can be quite rushed in the process, that is, you will quickly need to know if it is the right person. You will quickly need to choose and you will quickly need the relationship to move forward. So it is a bit this spirit of haste. And here the problem this often creates is that you may botch your choice, not really make a choice and so in the end delay even more the process of finding the person who truly suits you.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><li style=\"font-weight: 400;\" aria-level=\"1\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And finally, you may make choices that are strategically not good for you. I am talking here notably about cases with time constraints, so a demanding job, or you have children or dependents. In those cases it is mathematically difficult for you to invest a lot of time in the search for partners, and so it is even more important to make conscious and strategic choices that will bring you the best results relative to the time you can invest. And that can allow you to really tip the balance.&nbsp;<\/span><\/li><\/ul>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-ca26664 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"ca26664\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Work-life_balance\"><\/span>Work-life balance<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c834fda elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"c834fda\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The last obstacle, I called it work-life balance, but we could also name it mental load or pre-burnout or burnout depending on the extent of the imbalance. The difference from obstacle 3 is a question of choice, of how I invest my time, that is, you still manage. Obstacle four is when it overflows, when the person feels overwhelmed by everything they have to do. The load or responsibility they carry. It is not necessarily always a question of time, it can be just a question of mental load. You can be in a bit of a pre-burnout situation, you notice that your brain is not working as well as before, that you are a bit slower, that you cannot be as efficient anymore. And often, in fact, people in this situation want to do more, so it is rather the opposite effect. They want to add searching for a partner to their to-do list. Except they do not have this mental disposition, they do not have this time to welcome a partner into their life, even if they want to. So here, it would be almost the opposite effect of obstacle number three.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And often what happens is that if these people meet people and a relationship begins to start, it quickly becomes too much. They are quickly overwhelmed by the situation because the other partner wants to see them too much, or asks too much or wants to invest too much, or gives the impression that it is going too fast whereas what the other is asking is a minimum to start a relationship. Here the impact is that as long as your mental energy is not there, as long as you are overwhelmed, you do not have the capacity to welcome someone into your life. It ultimately requires you to stop a search for a certain amount of time before you have this capacity to welcome someone.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Because without this mental energy, without this balance, in fact, you do not really leave room for another partner in your life.&nbsp;<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So there you go, these were the four obstacles that I want to develop in the <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">following episodes<\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. I would be interested to see whether one obstacle resonated more than another. Join me on <\/span><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/sandykaufmann_lovecoach\/?hl=fr\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-736b3afb elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"736b3afb\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-eb64ff5\" data-id=\"eb64ff5\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2e2cc7e9 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"2e2cc7e9\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"Going_further\"><\/span>Going further<span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7be0a4a5 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"7be0a4a5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you want to explore the topic further and identify your own love patterns, you have <a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/livre-souvrir-a-lamour-et-si-la-solution-se-trouvait-du-cote-du-nerf-vague\/\">my book <\/a><\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/livre-souvrir-a-lamour-et-si-la-solution-se-trouvait-du-cote-du-nerf-vague\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">S\u2019ouvrir \u00e0 l\u2019amour<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> available in all bookstores.<\/span><\/p>\n<span style=\"font-size: 30px;\">And finally, if you are ready to open up to love and transform your love life, I invite you to join my coaching program <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 30px; background-color: #ffffff;\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/opening-up-to-love\/\">Opening up to love<\/a><span style=\"font-size: 30px;\">.&nbsp;You can take the Day of the Past option, a day of <strong>Somatic Deprogramming<\/strong>: a psycho-corporal practice to deprogram the automatic patterns of the nervous system and reprogram new relational reflexes.<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6d8a45e elementor-align-center elementor-mobile-align-center elementor-widget elementor-widget-button\" data-id=\"6d8a45e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"button.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-button-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-button elementor-button-link elementor-size-md\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/fr\/souvrir-a-lamour\/\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-content-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-button-text\">OPENING UP TO LOVE<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-1efee2fa elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"1efee2fa\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-11565105\" data-id=\"11565105\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4fb9dba1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"4fb9dba1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>\n<div id=\"sb_instagram\"  class=\"sbi sbi_mob_col_1 sbi_tab_col_2 sbi_col_6\" style=\"padding-bottom: 10px; background-color: rgb(255,255,255); width: 100%;\"\t data-feedid=\"sbi_17841411036917986#6\"  data-res=\"thumb\" data-cols=\"6\" data-colsmobile=\"1\" data-colstablet=\"2\" data-num=\"6\" data-nummobile=\"\" data-item-padding=\"5\"\t data-shortcode-atts=\"{}\"  data-postid=\"1246055\" data-locatornonce=\"14eb9463f8\" data-imageaspectratio=\"1:1\" data-sbi-flags=\"favorLocal,ajaxPostLoad,gdpr\">\n\t\n\t<div id=\"sbi_images\"  style=\"gap: 10px;\">\n\t\t\t<\/div>\n\n\t<div id=\"sbi_load\" >\n\n\t\n\t\n<\/div>\n\t\t<span class=\"sbi_resized_image_data\" data-feed-id=\"sbi_17841411036917986#6\"\n\t\t  data-resized=\"{&quot;18118016777519826&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;855211488_18209257804367898_2707775799257534615_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.56&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;17962968867246866&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;862863024_18209407003367898_568550170244515627_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.80&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;18140584828624146&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;869215033_1389641902969347_8578325988117994874_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.56&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;18429377227147489&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;866482167_2182305922692538_5271048855071705297_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.56&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;18055768535592798&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;872107883_1449197683979466_4248963448416034_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.56&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;18109438760157937&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;877260471_18210321157367898_4940877832447561429_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.80&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;17986359900086237&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;883256365_2776487892769609_5677326827125916143_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.56&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;18433462951148255&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;885745171_1722032269295601_5738953465599503294_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.56&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;},&quot;18112843040104997&quot;:{&quot;id&quot;:&quot;888511227_18210929308367898_7575863731275782987_n&quot;,&quot;ratio&quot;:&quot;0.80&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:{&quot;full&quot;:640,&quot;low&quot;:320,&quot;thumb&quot;:150},&quot;extension&quot;:&quot;.jpg&quot;}}\">\n\t<\/span>\n\t<\/div>\n\n<\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-18bd44df elementor-section-full_width elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"18bd44df\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-no\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-4c8f40ec\" data-id=\"4c8f40ec\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-inner-section elementor-element elementor-element-871053 elementor-section-content-bottom elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"871053\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-15da6cd8\" data-id=\"15da6cd8\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4235d05f elementor-widget elementor-widget-spacer\" data-id=\"4235d05f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"spacer.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-spacer\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-spacer-inner\"><\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-inner-section elementor-element elementor-element-53894b72 elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"53894b72\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-50 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-3325ad41\" data-id=\"3325ad41\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1ed0c893 elementor-invisible elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"1ed0c893\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;_animation&quot;:&quot;fadeInLeft&quot;}\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\">Sandy Kaufmann\n<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1143a12f elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"1143a12f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: large;\"><span style=\"caret-color: #000000;\">is a somatic therapist and coach, based in Switzerland. She is the author of two books published by \u00c9ditions Eyrolles and has accompanied more than 600 people. She is the creator of the Somatic Deprogramming method and hosts the podcast &#8220;<a href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/blog\/\">S&#8217;ouvrir \u00e0 l&#8217;amour<\/a>&#8220;, ranked in the French top 50 in the relationships category.<\/span><\/span>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-50 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-1eb7f10\" data-id=\"1eb7f10\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-2b0c4aa2 elementor-section-full_width elementor-section-height-min-height elementor-section-items-stretch elementor-section-content-middle elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"2b0c4aa2\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-50 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-4777e6d3\" data-id=\"4777e6d3\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-inner-section elementor-element elementor-element-5bccdb0c elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"5bccdb0c\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-20 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-102cf14 elementor-sm-33\" data-id=\"102cf14\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1cc36f72 elementor-view-default elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon\" data-id=\"1cc36f72\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-icon-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon\" href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sandykaufmanncoaching\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\n\t\t\t<i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"fab fa-facebook-f\"><\/i>\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-377566b6 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"377566b6\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sandykaufmanncoaching\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Facebook<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-20 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-73f1e100 elementor-sm-33\" data-id=\"73f1e100\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7152f8aa elementor-view-default elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon\" data-id=\"7152f8aa\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-icon-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon\" href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/sandykaufmann_lovecoach\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\n\t\t\t<i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"fab fa-instagram\"><\/i>\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2bf3ec34 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"2bf3ec34\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/sandykaufmann_lovecoach\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Instagram<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-20 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-76071aa1 elementor-sm-33\" data-id=\"76071aa1\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-666d090c elementor-view-default elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon\" data-id=\"666d090c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-icon-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCK-hi3HapAMgqRQ268Ode-A?\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\n\t\t\t<i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"fab fa-youtube\"><\/i>\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-50f9829 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"50f9829\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCK-hi3HapAMgqRQ268Ode-A?\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Youtube<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-20 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-de702d1 elementor-sm-33\" data-id=\"de702d1\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7e03408 elementor-view-default elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon\" data-id=\"7e03408\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-icon-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon\" href=\"http:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/fr\/podcast\/souvrir-%C3%A0-lamour\/id1594692189?l=en\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\n\t\t\t<i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"fas fa-podcast\"><\/i>\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-b0ef062 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"b0ef062\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\"><a href=\"http:\/\/podcasts.apple.com\/fr\/podcast\/souvrir-%C3%A0-lamour\/id1594692189?l=en\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Apple<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-20 elementor-inner-column elementor-element elementor-element-4b90d6c elementor-sm-33\" data-id=\"4b90d6c\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3675119 elementor-view-default elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon\" data-id=\"3675119\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-icon-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-icon\" href=\"\">\n\t\t\t<i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"fab fa-spotify\"><\/i>\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-681ea62 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"681ea62\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-large\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/channel\/UCK-hi3HapAMgqRQ268Ode-A?ahttp:\/\/open.spotify.com\/show\/5Wz6EFR37F8Yqmzhmy0RMP\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Spotify<\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-50 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-4962630b\" data-id=\"4962630b\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-409b0965 elementor-icon-list--layout-traditional elementor-list-item-link-full_width elementor-widget elementor-widget-icon-list\" data-id=\"409b0965\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"icon-list.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<ul class=\"elementor-icon-list-items\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<li class=\"elementor-icon-list-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"mailto:info@sandykaufmann.ch\">\n\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"far fa-envelope\"><\/i>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-icon-list-text\">info@sandykaufmann.ch<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/li>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/ul>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<div id=\"ez-toc-container\" class=\"ez-toc-v2_0_84 counter-hierarchy ez-toc-counter ez-toc-grey ez-toc-container-direction\">\n<p class=\"ez-toc-title\" style=\"cursor:inherit\">Table des mati\u00e8res<\/p>\n<label for=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6aebde2083aef\" class=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-label\"><span class=\"\"><span class=\"eztoc-hide\" style=\"display:none;\">Toggle<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-icon-toggle-span\"><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" class=\"list-377408\" width=\"20px\" height=\"20px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\"><path d=\"M6 6H4v2h2V6zm14 0H8v2h12V6zM4 11h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2zM4 16h2v2H4v-2zm16 0H8v2h12v-2z\" fill=\"currentColor\"><\/path><\/svg><svg style=\"fill: #999;color:#999\" class=\"arrow-unsorted-368013\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" width=\"10px\" height=\"10px\" viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" version=\"1.2\" baseProfile=\"tiny\"><path d=\"M18.2 9.3l-6.2-6.3-6.2 6.3c-.2.2-.3.4-.3.7s.1.5.3.7c.2.2.4.3.7.3h11c.3 0 .5-.1.7-.3.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7zM5.8 14.7l6.2 6.3 6.2-6.3c.2-.2.3-.5.3-.7s-.1-.5-.3-.7c-.2-.2-.4-.3-.7-.3h-11c-.3 0-.5.1-.7.3-.2.2-.3.5-.3.7s.1.5.3.7z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><\/span><\/label><input type=\"checkbox\"  id=\"ez-toc-cssicon-toggle-item-6aebde2083aef\" checked aria-label=\"Toggle\" \/><nav><ul class='ez-toc-list ez-toc-list-level-1 ' ><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-1\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/#FREE_Webinar_%22HOW_TO_FREE_OURSELVES_FROM_THE_PATTERNS_THAT_PREVENT_US_FROM_BEING_HAPPY_IN_LOVE%22\" >FREE Webinar \n\"HOW TO FREE OURSELVES FROM THE PATTERNS THAT PREVENT US FROM BEING HAPPY IN LOVE?\"<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-2\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/#The_four_indirect_obstacles_to_love\" >The four indirect obstacles to love<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-3\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/#Self-confidence\" >Self-confidence<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-4\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/#Body_acceptance\" >Body acceptance<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-5\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/#Lack_of_time\" >Lack of time<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-6\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/#Work-life_balance\" >Work-life balance<\/a><\/li><li class='ez-toc-page-1 ez-toc-heading-level-2'><a class=\"ez-toc-link ez-toc-heading-7\" href=\"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/75-the-4-indirect-obstacles-to-love\/#Going_further\" >Going further<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/nav><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The 4 indirect obstacles to love You are listening to episode 75, the four indirect obstacles to love. Normally, in my episodes, I talk a lot about the impact of your past, of your love patterns on your love life. If you are discovering my podcast now, I recommend listening to episode 3 on love [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"elementor_header_footer","format":"standard","meta":{"ocean_post_layout":"full-screen","ocean_both_sidebars_style":"","ocean_both_sidebars_content_width":0,"ocean_both_sidebars_sidebars_width":0,"ocean_sidebar":"0","ocean_second_sidebar":"0","ocean_disable_margins":"enable","ocean_add_body_class":"","ocean_shortcode_before_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_after_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_before_header":"","ocean_shortcode_after_header":"","ocean_has_shortcode":"","ocean_shortcode_after_title":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_bottom":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_bottom":"","ocean_display_top_bar":"default","ocean_display_header":"default","ocean_header_style":"","ocean_center_header_left_menu":"0","ocean_custom_header_template":"0","ocean_custom_logo":0,"ocean_custom_retina_logo":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_height":0,"ocean_header_custom_menu":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_family":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_subset":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_size":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_unit":"px","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_line_height":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_unit":"","ocean_menu_typo_spacing":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_unit":"","ocean_menu_link_color":"","ocean_menu_link_color_hover":"","ocean_menu_link_color_active":"","ocean_menu_link_background":"","ocean_menu_link_hover_background":"","ocean_menu_link_active_background":"","ocean_menu_social_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_links_color":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_color":"","ocean_disable_title":"default","ocean_disable_heading":"default","ocean_post_title":"","ocean_post_subheading":"","ocean_post_title_style":"","ocean_post_title_background_color":"","ocean_post_title_background":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_image_position":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_attachment":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_repeat":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_size":"","ocean_post_title_height":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay":0.5,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay_color":"","ocean_disable_breadcrumbs":"default","ocean_breadcrumbs_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_separator_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_hover_color":"","ocean_display_footer_widgets":"default","ocean_display_footer_bottom":"default","ocean_custom_footer_template":"0","ocean_post_oembed":"","ocean_post_self_hosted_media":"","ocean_post_video_embed":"","ocean_link_format":"","ocean_link_format_target":"self","ocean_quote_format":"","ocean_quote_format_link":"post","ocean_gallery_link_images":"on","ocean_gallery_id":[],"footnotes":""},"categories":[69],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1246055","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-behaviour","entry","owp-thumbs-layout-horizontal","owp-btn-normal","owp-tabs-layout-horizontal","has-no-thumbnails"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1246055","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1246055"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1246055\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1246126,"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1246055\/revisions\/1246126"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1246055"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1246055"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1246055"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}