{"id":1104430,"date":"2026-07-09T05:58:13","date_gmt":"2026-07-09T05:58:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/?p=1104430"},"modified":"2026-07-10T06:18:48","modified_gmt":"2026-07-10T06:18:48","slug":"203-how-to-avoid-traumatising-your-children-in-the-nervous-system-sense","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sandykaufmann.ch\/en\/203-how-to-avoid-traumatising-your-children-in-the-nervous-system-sense\/","title":{"rendered":"203. How to Avoid Traumatising Your Children (in the Nervous System Sense)?"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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How to Avoid Traumatising Your Children (in the Nervous System Sense) ?\n<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t

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\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tYou are a parent who is sensitive to the impact of childhood on adult life,\non the way we relate to others as adults.<\/span>\n \nOr you would like to avoid traumatising your child and give them, as much as\npossible, a secure attachment \u2014 but you don’t know how?<\/span>\n \nOr perhaps you think that having a gentle, child-centred upbringing means a life\nof sacrifice for parents, and you’d like to find the right balance.<\/span>\n \nThis episode aims to explain what truly traumatises a child. To do so, I draw on\nthe book by Peter Levine<\/strong>, creator of the Somatic Experiencing<\/strong> method,\nand Maggie Kline<\/strong>, called Trauma-Proofing Your Kids<\/em>.<\/span>\n \nI’ll also share my advice as an imperfect mother who finds the right balance\ndifficult \u2014 and as a therapist who has accompanied more than 600 people<\/strong>\nwith childhood wounds.<\/span>\n \n

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<\/span>What truly traumatises a child\n\n\n<\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tAs Peter Levine<\/strong>, creator of the Somatic Experiencing method, explains,\ntrauma in the nervous system sense is a part of life. It’s unavoidable.<\/span>\n
\nHow does trauma form?<\/b>\n
\nIt simply happens when a child experiences emotional stress they were unable to\nregulate \u2014 either on their own or with the help of an adult (co-regulation).\nWe distinguish between shocks (wars, illness, violence, medical procedures, a\ndifficult birth, loss of a loved one, or any sudden\/uncontrollable event),\ndevelopmental trauma (created in relationship, primarily with you as a parent),\nand chronic stress.<\/span>\n\nThis means it’s not the event itself that creates trauma, but the failure to\nregulate it \u2014 which leaves an imprint and dysregulates the nervous system.<\/span>\n\nA child can experience an emotionally difficult event: if they felt supported and\nheard, there is not necessarily a trauma. It’s simply a difficult life experience.\nOur nervous system is capable of handling these stressors.<\/span>\n
\nWhat are the physiological signs of a potential trauma?<\/b>\n
\nGenerally, whenever your child over-reacts or remains stoic in the face of\nemotional stress. Physiologically, you may notice: glassy eyes, pale skin, rapid\nor shallow pulse and breathing, a sense of being “disoriented”, appearing <\/span>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t
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For you<\/p>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t

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<\/span>FREE Webinar \n\"HOW TO FREE OURSELVES FROM THE PATTERNS THAT PREVENT US FROM BEING HAPPY IN LOVE?\"<\/span><\/span><\/h2>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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